Agreement Conversation

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Take respon­si­bility for the quality of your par­tic­i­pa­tion and your con­ver­sa­tion as a whole. Be proac­tive in get­ting your­self and others back on track if nec­es­sary. Use an agreed signal such as the “Time Out” sign if you feel that the agree­ments are not being respected. We will check. If you are aware with people of the pur­pose of the meeting and the format of the dis­cus­sion, time is easy to rec­on­cile. If you get time resis­tance, go back to step 2 and check the process. If they don‘t agree on the process, make sure you‘ve agreed on the out­come. Or let‘s start from scratch by nego­ti­ating a dif­ferent result, per­haps an inter­me­diate step. Don‘t pre­tend to move for­ward until you find the “why” that everyone can sup­port. At the end of this meeting, we will both have a clear idea of whether my exec­u­tive coaching is right for you at this stage of your busi­ness and your life. We have a spe­cific and con­fi­den­tial con­ver­sa­tion about you, your com­pany and your goals. We will dis­cuss your results and projects in detail. Please agree that we will speak pri­vately for two hours and without interruption.

This is per­haps one of the weakest sen­tences of the agree­ment in Eng­lish. Nor­mally, people say this when they don‘t really engage in some­thing, but also don‘t see why they should oppose it. Agree­ments and dis­agree­ments are usu­ally about your per­sonal thoughts and feel­ings about some­thing. Phrases like “I think” or “in my opinion” make it clear that you are giving an opinion and not a fact. If you com­pletely agree with someone, this simple sen­tence is appro­priate. My con­ver­sa­tion con­tract is based on a pro­ce­dure devel­oped by ther­a­pists to help people achieve good results in oth­er­wise stressful con­ver­sa­tions with spouses, teens, or a dif­fi­cult boss. These lines from Katy Perry‘s song, “Agree to Dis­agree,” show that just because you don‘t agree with someone doesn‘t mean a friendly, romantic, or even pro­fes­sional rela­tion­ship isn‘t pos­sible. In fact, agree­ments and dis­agree­ments are part of any rela­tion­ship. Have you ever been frus­trated by a con­ver­sa­tion, or walked out of a meeting thinking, “We weren‘t on the same side” or “I wish we had known we‘d talk about it.” It hap­pens all the time, doesn‘t it? Using the con­ver­sa­tion con­tract pre­vents these sit­u­a­tions. This tech­nique can even stop it the moment it threatens to ruin your meeting. This indi­cates a very strong agreement.. .

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